Empathy and Energy Management
“Solidarity, one might say, emerges through empathizing with the fate of others.”
As I write this we are entering the seventh month of the ongoing and escalating Israeli assault on Gaza. Many people around the country, including college students (also faculty and staff) have been engaged in a growing protest movement. This movement is in solidarity with the people of Gaza and with the plight of other dispossessed people around the globe.
This seems as good a time as any to discuss the relationship between empathy, health, and ways to remain grounded and present during this pivotal time for our country and for our planet.
This blog briefly reviews empathy and how our empathic nature can influence our health. I offer tools for working with your energetic body to support presence and well-being. These tools can benefit everyone, but especially empaths.
What is empathy?
Empathy is the ability to imagine and appreciate what another person is going through, even if you are not experiencing it yourself. Empathy supports bonds of closeness and relating. Practicing empathy enhances our ability to be present, understanding, and supportive, leading to personal growth and improved relationships.
What is an empath?
An empath is a person who not only imagines what another person is going through but may often be able to experience it to a greater or lesser degree. There are different types of empaths.
Emotional empaths have a heightened sensitivity to the emotional states of others and will often feel or confuse the emotions of others for their own. When emotional empaths find themselves in situations where there are many people and/or strong emotions, they will often feel overwhelmed by the intensity of what they are experiencing.
Physical empaths possess a strong ability to pick up on the physical symptoms of another person and will often feel these symptoms in their own body.
What are some of the challenges that empaths face?
One of the challenges that empaths face is that they might not always be aware that they have this ability or discern when what they are experiencing is related to their own emotional/physical experience or that of someone else in their environment.
Because they are often able to feel the emotional and physical distress of others so acutely, they have a strong desire to help relieve this suffering. As a result, they may overextend themselves in providing assistance to others while also neglecting their own physical and emotional needs. A recipe for burnout. Empaths often become physically and emotionally exhausted and may experience a variety of health issues related to this chronic over-activation of their stress response.
Many people who work in healthcare and other healing/helping professions are empaths. They feel called to support others in their healing process. They also frequently get burned out.
Many of us feel things very deeply. With the current events in the world, it can feel overwhelming to reconcile all of the strong emotions that we may feel and be witness to - through our relationships and on social media. Having tools to manage our empathic abilities is foundational to maintaining ourselves. When we are centered on who we are and well, we can best support others from our most creative and abundant place. This is true no matter what our work is —healthcare worker, teacher, parent, programmer, political organizer, or something else.
Self-care for empaths (and everyone else!)
Energy management is an important aspect of maintaining well-being. This is vitally important for empaths who are highly sensitive to these subtle energies, but it is also a helpful practice for those who do not consider themselves empaths.
There are many tools and strategies for managing our life energy. What follows are some basic practices that I like to share with my clients/patients and use myself.
I created short videos for each. Here is a link to the entire playlist. They are linked to each title below.
While seated or lying down, start paying attention to your breath. As you do, you will notice that it often becomes slower and deeper. Try to have your out-breath be longer than your in-breath.
Now, focus on the area of your chest where your heart is located. Imagine that you are breathing in and out of your heart as you breathe. As you breathe in, your heart expands, and as you breathe out, it contracts. Continue to breathe slowly and deeply (with your out-breath longer than your in-breath), imagining the breath moving in and out from your heart for a few minutes.
While seated, bring your attention inward. Feel where your body is connected to the surface that you are seated on. Now, imagine a cord extending out from your tailbone and moving downward. It moves downward from the surface you are seated on, down into the floor, and through whatever layers are between the floor and the ground below. Once it makes it to the ground it keeps traveling deeper and deeper through the layers of the earth’s surface, connecting deeply into the earth and anchoring you energetically. You can activate this cord when you need to be reminded of your connection and relationship to the earth, its support, and its solidity.
Once you establish this connection with the grounding cord, you can also visualize the bi-directional flow of this grounding cord. It is a conduit that can be used to recycle and compost whatever problematic energies you may be carrying, and to draw up through your root (located at the tailbone connection) energies that you need to sustain and nurture you.
This can be a helpful practice when it may not feel safe or too activating to go into some of the more internal spaces of your body, but you still need to get a sense of space and differentiation from the energies that are swirling around you. This exercise can help you get more clear on where your body ends/begins.
With your eyes open or closed (whichever feels best) take a moment to start to pay attention to the interface - the places where your body is in contact with the exterior world. Feel the interface between the skin of your face and the environment of the room, where your feet touch the floor and your bottom touches the seat of the surface on which you are sitting. Feel into the interface of other areas of your body that feel accessible and safe to do this exercise with, can you feel the air on the back of your neck, the weight of your clothes where they touch your back? Imagine the outline of your form, this interface between you and the outside world.
Expanding and Contracting Your Boundary
This exercise follows well from the one we just did. It is best practiced when you feel like you are in a safe place, as it involves consciously working with and expanding your energetic boundary, something that you may not wish to do if you are around many people or in an environment that feels less than safe.
You imagine the boundary of your body, where you begin, and the outside world ends. You may notice that a color comes to mind for this boundary (if no color comes, this is also fine). Now, imagine that you can actually expand this boundary. As you breathe out imagine moving that energetic boundary out away from your body. At first, you might just move it out maybe a foot away from your body. Take a few breaths with this expanded boundary, and then imagine bringing it back closer within a couple of inches of your body. Over time, you can continue to work with this practice and get to the point that you may expand your boundary to the dimensions of the room in which you are located and then bring it back in closer to your body.
Practicing this exercise and getting very good at expanding and contracting your energetic boundary under command can be a very helpful skill to have. Crowded environments can be especially draining for empaths, often because their energetic centers are open and their boundaries are expanded some distance beyond their bodies. As you start to work with your energy body and notice in real time what you are feeling, if you find yourself in such a situation, it is easy to draw your energy back closer to you. You can even do this proactively. Are you about to get on a crowded bus or visit a crowded meeting? Do this beforehand and notice if it helps you feel more contained and less drained.
Clearing other people’s energy
Empaths often find that their energy and mood can fluctuate substantially even during the course of the day. One reason for this is that they often tap into emotions and energetic material that is not their own.
When you find yourself experiencing emotions or thinking a thought that feels heavy or leaves you exhausted, overwhelmed, irritated, or in some way not yourself or your best, try this exercise.
This is one of my favorite exercises. It is so simple but often so powerful. I credit Tamara Childs, a gifted empath coach, for sharing this exercise with me.
Ask yourself the question, “Is this energy mine?” You can ask yourself out loud or internally.
Then, pause and wait for a response. The response often will come as a feeling. It could be a feeling of heaviness or weight. If this is the case, then this is not your energy.
You can then make the statement.
“This energy is heavy. Who does it belong to? “
You don't need to receive an answer or a name. Merely asking the question will provide space for what is needed, and that is a shifting of the energy.
You can then say or imagine pushing a button that says “Return to sender.” To clear yourself of this unwanted energy imprint that is not yours.
Adopting this practice consistently will enhance your clarity and awareness of how often what we experience may indeed not be “our own stuff”.
To your health.
Dr. Nicole 🌿
Dr. Nicole Winbush provides integrative and functional medicine health consults through her Sankofa Healing Arts & Functional Medicine practice. Based in Durham, NC, and working with people in North Carolina, Georgia, California, and Minnesota, she provides an array of approaches to support individuals in their unique healing path and goals. To learn more, visit sankofahealingarts.com. For additional inquiries, you can contact the office here.
